Dear Richard,

I have to take this question because it very much reminds me of my own life's struggle.
As a certain U.S. president, whom I've never voted for, once said, I feel your pain.

Many people claim they are certain of God's will for them either in the:

• priesthood
• religious life, or
• married life.

I've never had that certainly and perhaps neither have you. You may have gifts, talents, and desires that would make you both a good husband, father and a good priest.

• What to do?

The Diaconate is an option, but you'd still have to work in the world. You could work on the parish level as a:

• youth minister
• pastoral associate, or
• director of religious education, whose newest fashionable name is
  director of faith formation.

These can be satisfying but usually don't pay much. You could be a theology teacher or a college professor of theology or philosophy in a Catholic school. There are a few jobs at the diocesan level as a director of a diocesan office. Check out your diocesan web site for this, or, if you live outside the USA, you can search for your diocesan web site. There are also some jobs in:

• Journalism
• Right to Life organizations
• Social services, as a counselor or case worker; or
• you could try to infiltrate the media working on secular T.V. or radio stations.
  
  There are some Catholic ones too.

Or you could be creative and entrepreneurial in founding your own:

• Catholic non-profit organization
• Catholic gift shop, or
• something else of your heart's desire.

For example, I'd like to open up my own Catholic-oriented coffee shop one day.

These are just some possibilities, several of which I have experience in. Pray and act.

I wish you good luck and God's blessings.

Paul

Hi, Richard —

There are more and more opportunities today for lay people to get involved in staff positions in the Church. Besides what my colleague mentioned, there are:

• Pastoral Associate
• Music Minister (often part-time but not always)
• Canon lawyer
• Apologist
• even Chancellor (basically second-in-command in the diocese).

On the other hand, we have to avoid the attitude that only clerics (or paid staff) do something important in the Church. That's called clericalism. We all have a role to play. Also, remember the Church is more than Father Joe and Bishop Robert and everyone paid by the chancery. Lay people, priests, and religious all comprise the Church.

We here at AskACatholic are unpaid lay people, and I like to think we're making a difference.
Raise good Catholic children and you can produce a priest or two or maybe even a bishop or saint. (Not that you can't be a saint yourself.)

If you're good at something secular, perhaps you can be a giver and contribute material funds to the Church. If you have artistic or literary skills perhaps you can work for a Catholic publisher. There is also a need for Catholic therapists, if you're of a psychological bent or, if being a physician is your thing, there is a need for doctors with expertise in:

• Natural Family Planning
• NaProtechnology, and
• other bioethical issues.

You might explore:

• Opus Dei which was founded on the principle that we can make a difference while living our lives in the world
• a third order, where people live out the charisms of a religious life in the context of marriage and secular vocations
• follow a calling similar to St. Therese of Lisieux, who taught the "little way" of doing small things with great love.

The key is, no matter what you do (unless it is immoral), you can do it for the glory of God and be sanctified through it. It would help to find a spiritual director and bring your concerns to him.

• Do you have particular talents that you feel called to use or, is it just a vague dissatisfaction with the secular life?

Unless you have a clear idea of what you'd do — a talent you really feel is unfulfilled in your secular vocation but would benefit the Church — I think I'd encourage you to pursue a secular vocation until you get some clarity, (unless you are quite young and want to explore the priesthood.)

Eric